January is here! 17 days off from school for winter break, 2 days in school, and 5 more days off! It’s been such a wonderfully full time with family. So many moods and so many grievances, lots of laughs, a million “I’m bored” complaints fielded, too much Amazon Prime to speak of, a carbohydrate frenzy, a few bottles of wine, many fires in the fireplace, and an embarrassing physical activity deficit.
The day isn’t over, so in case you are the default parent and home with your kids again, this is my list of games to play based on actual experience:
1) Chutes and Ladders (It’s such a great lesson in good and bad fortune. A game where you have no control over your destiny.)
2) Spirograph (You know you have a box sitting around from a pile of unopened birthday or Christmas presents from years past. It’s incredibly frustrating for young hands and will surely end with the positioning ring thrown across the room and stomping.)
3) Legos (Make sure your child sets up the Legos in a dimly lit corner of the room where pieces can easily fall into the floor vent.)
4) Make Up and Hair Salon (This is only going to work if you have unflattering and unrealistic color palettes, color hair spray, and copious amounts of glitter in each article of makeup.)
5) Don’t Touch Anyone Else’s Feet (Sit 2 kids on a couch that’s big enough for 10 adults, make sure they are within 1 centimeter of each other and then see who can go the longest without screaming that the other one has touched her feet.)
6) I’m Hungry (This one is sure to keep the default parent on her toes! You will want to position an adult right next to the pantry for the entire day as non-stop orders flood in from children who are eating out of pure boredom. They have no cravings and no nutritional needs. The world is their oyster, but NOTHING sounds good. Keep naming items in the pantry and fingers crossed you will soon win!)
7) School (It may be hard for your children to play right away as it’s a foreign concept. Slowly remind them of what School is and then direct them to do different things like writing words or math puzzles while they scream at you that you’re doing everything out of order.)
8) Work the Knots (Your children have been laying on sofas, beds, and each other for so many days on end that you’re worried you will find some bird eggs in their hair come spring. Get out every brush in the house, some oils, detangler, Kleenex for tears, and see who can get their knots out first!)
9) Gizmo Sounds (If your child is old enough, get them a Gizmo and listen as they play with the settings for hours on end because it’s basically the only thing to do besides call and text. Enjoy the beeps and dings!)
10) Spend Money (Take your kids anywhere, at any cost. This sounds fun but don’t get ahead of yourself! The kids will have to take off their pajamas and remember what it feels like to put on clothes that have limitations like zippers and buttons. If you’re going to ask them to bundle up, build in another 2 hours of fighting and then determine your departure time. If your destination operates within normal business hours, then it may be worth just staying home.)
In conclusion, it’s been fun but all good things must come to an end! You have a few hours left in the day to try out some of these fun games and I hope you win big!!